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So here’s the thing, you don’t need negative people in your life. Mind blowing, right? We get so accustomed to certain people and their Negative Nancy mentality that we suck it up, make excuses for them, and just deal. WHY? Why the hell do we do that to ourselves? Their issue with happiness and joy is about their life, not yours. Their issues are about themselves, not you. And yet, we find ourselves getting sucked under their rain cloud and sulking along beside them. STOP.
FORGO the friendship. Relationship. Connection. Step away from it and breathe. You’ll realize when you stop the texts, the obligatory hangouts, the forced functions, and the fake social media likes/comments…that you can actually BREATHE.
Before I met my husband, I would hang out with a group of women. We were all very different, but the sole thing we had in common was the unhappiness we had in our love lives. We were all with the wrong person and hanging out gave us a chance to vent and rant about our inconsiderate, awful, boring, etc. boyfriends that we had chosen. (Yeah, women have a gift at choosing the wrong guy and sticking with him even when we feel it is wrong, why do we do that? But, once again, a topic for another time) Anyways, when I started dating my now husband, I didn’t have a bad thing to say about him. (Years later I still don’t have one negative thought. I don’t see him enough. That is truly my biggest complaint. My work-from-home, best friend of a husband, I don’t get to see enough so that’s my greatest burden. How lucky am I? Truly.) So in my lack of negativity, they judged me. “You must be moving too fast…It won’t work out…You spend too much time together…” and so on. They didn’t know how to be happy for me, because they didn’t know how to be happy for themselves.
See that’s the thing, when people are unhappy with their own lives and themselves, they spread that unhappiness like wild fire to those they are closest too. I ended every single friendship that brought that negativity. The same women who are unhappy when you’re happy are the same people who can’t praise your success, can’t compliment your physical appearance, and can’t fathom that your joy is actually genuine.
So, why surround yourself with that?
I’ve created new friendships since then. I had to start from ground zero. No best friend, no confidante, or true allies. I think it must have appeared as though I chose a man over my girlfriends, but in reality, I chose me over them. Women should empower other women. They should recognize that your beauty, success, charm, intelligence, and so on doesn’t alter their own. Life isn’t meant to be one big competition.
I’ve always used the running analogy when it comes to life. Imagine you have to wake up every day at 4 am to go running. When you tell another person this they will often say, “Oh man, that sucks…that sounds brutal…that must be awful.” Then they pity you for a brief moment. The subject changes, you finish your meal, you go your separate ways and the very next day the only person waking up at 4 am to run is you. The only person that is actually effected by running early in the morning is you. So, why care what they think? Why allow that negativity to seep into your world? Remember that plenty of people have their thoughts and opinions on who you are and what you do, but at the end of the day the only person that needs to be happy with your life is YOU.
If I could offer you any piece of advice it would be this:
Re-evaluate the people in your life and how they impact you.
Use social media for good and don’t get sucked into all the nonsense.
Remember that your life is your own, so make it a damn good and happy one.
Here are a few items to get you going on your own happiness journey!!
<–LINK! On Sale! Under $12!
<–LINK! “Present Not Perfect” Journal!
<–LINK! Just $9! Love this book!
<–LINK! Because, how great is this??
<–LINK! Under $10! So cute!
<–Link! Wall Art–Love this quote!
Have a beautifully positive day!!